I like that each character had a certain job to do. Next time, you could say what your job was, describe the island, describe what you all looked like after 10 years.
Next time add punctuation and check for capitals even though it's short you should try and add detail and descriptive writing to make a picture in the readers head.
Great story keep it up
ReplyDeleteI like that each character had a certain job to do.
ReplyDeleteNext time, you could say what your job was, describe the island, describe what you all looked like after 10 years.
Nice Story,
ReplyDeleteI liked your creativity and the way your story flowed. Next time you could work on adding in more detail and improving your punctuation.
Your ideas were great just a bit more detail,information,punctuation and yeah :)
ReplyDeleteAwesome story and great effort.
ReplyDeleteNext time add punctuation and check for capitals even though it's short you should try and add detail and descriptive writing to make a picture in the readers head.