Tuesday, 18 June 2013

Patrick's The Day I Met A Space Creature

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1BVpS8XYBgu5Qhz7SlyYJynXOP_WVJdINAI1779kA23I/edit

Hope u like it p;ease comment :-]

Posted by at

10 comments:

  1. Anonymous19 June 2013 at 15:29

    Great story room 6 you had a good use of words, KEEP IT UP

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous19 June 2013 at 15:33

    This is a really great story :)

    Hannah

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anonymous19 June 2013 at 15:51

    Nice story Patrick! :)
    -Kosmas, Riccarton Primary School

    ReplyDelete
  4. Joshua19 June 2013 at 20:11

    Dear Patrick,
    My name is Joshua,
    your story was intresting because of its great amount of descriptive language, but your punctuation wasn't that great.
    Hope you visit our blog.
    From your new blog buddy Joshua

    ReplyDelete
  5. Holly19 June 2013 at 20:20

    Hello Patrick,
    My name is Holly and I'm from 56steps.
    I thought that your story was very despricptive,however, if it were my story, I would of used similies to describe how I felt.

    Yours truly,
    Holly

    ReplyDelete
  6. natasha19 June 2013 at 20:22

    Hi Patrik,

    love your story i love how you met a space creacher.

    Natasha

    ReplyDelete
  7. Emily19 June 2013 at 20:26

    Hi Patrick,

    We found your story quite funny.What you could improve on is self editing such as checking for grammatical mistake, capital letters. We found that a bit of your story did not really make sense.

    Shanita and Emily

    ReplyDelete
  8. Anonymous20 June 2013 at 13:06

    Hi Patrick

    Nice story you used good words and it was funny
    From Megan-Riccarton primary school

    ReplyDelete
  9. room 620 June 2013 at 19:33

    Sorry about the gramma and stuff guys thanks for the comments hope to talk with youse soon by

    ReplyDelete
  10. room 620 June 2013 at 19:34

    From paddy a.k.a patrick

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)